September 21, 2023
Ironically, secular society hastily quotes a famous Bible line to push their godless agenda on Catholics and other Christians. This quote that today’s culture – and regrettably, inauthentic Christians – love to recite is from Matthew 7:1, where Jesus states, “Do not judge.” With those simple three words resounding in their ears, along with the culture’s misguided influence and aggressive peer-pressure, too many self-described Christians today feel justified in letting everyone do anything they want, from a man so-called “marrying” another man to a girl so-called “transitioning” to become a boy. Today’s off-the-mark culture insists that Jesus would have cautioned against opposing so-called gay marriage or so-called transgenderism because it would be the sin of acting judgmentally.
The haste is in failing to quote all of Jesus’s words about judging. Let’s put things in context and read more Scripture than just these three words, so we can recognize that Jesus went on to say 99 more words in this portion of the Gospel of Matthew. Don’t stop at verse 1; continue reading all the words in verses 1 through 5:
“Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.”
When listening to all of Jesus’s words and breaking down the passage line by line, Jesus was not telling his disciples to never judge the behavior of others. Instead, the Lord wants us to not make rash judgment and to not be hypocritical. If we have to admonish our neighbors for something that we know would be bad in God’s eyes, it will come across as sincere and be more effective if we aren’t hypocrites. If we try our best to live our lives according to God’s commandments, and if we strive to properly form our consciences, we will know sin when we see it. It is because we care for others’ salvation that we sometimes must judge them in our efforts to help get them on the right path.
We are not judging their eternal reward or damnation. Only God gets to judge what will become of us when we die. But we are judging if an action is sinful or not, and in a loving way letting people whom we care about know, in hope they will see the light and change their sinful ways. Basically, Jesus expects us to judge, but with right judgment. Judging objectively is allowed; judging subjectively is not.
To counter the ignorant or heretical Christian who says Jesus told us to “judge not!”, it is best done by explaining that a person has their exterior component and their interior component, which we call their conscience. Whereas we can never judge someone’s conscience and cannot be the judge to decide if their soul is perfect enough to make it to heaven, we are actually expected to judge someone’s exterior component, as ascertained by their actions. If not, then we should never speak up if a man is raping a woman or if a child abuser is creating child pornography. But of course, we speak out against these actions, just as we should speak out against other actions that God has said are wrong, such as any type of heterosexual sexual activity outside of marriage and any type of homosexual sexual activity.
There is a big difference between judging someone and judging behavior. The former we are to avoid, but the latter we are to practice because using right judgment is the means by which we can counsel those for whom we care. We would never be able to practice the spiritual work of mercy – to admonish the sinner – were we not allowed to judge. This act of admonishing might best be phrased as tough love. Judging or admonishing will only be effective if we practice what we preach and if we’re not self-righteous. The “do what I say and not what I do” approach won’t cut it. Neither will it work to condemn sin we see in others but overlook sin in ourselves.
The road of life for today’s culture is extremely wide and easy to take, which is why do many follow the path to eternal damnation. The road to heaven is narrow and difficult to take. This path that Jesus calls us to take is not only demanding, but it is easy to stray from because of the distractions of the world, the disinformation and misinformation coming from media, and the siren-song luring from the entertainment industry.
“Strive to enter through the narrow door; for many, I tell you, will try to enter and will not be able.” (Luke 13:24)
When I contemplate this sharp and somewhat shocking statement from Jesus about many ending up in hell, I am compelled to seriously examine the path I am traveling on, and to humbly evaluate if I am choosing the one that leads through the narrow door. Moreover, I am also worried about my neighbors (which is the all-encompassing term that includes friends, acquaintances, coworkers, school parents, and students), and pray that if they are currently taking the easy road laid out by today’s culture that they get off that road and take the tougher, narrower path laid out by our Almighty Creator.
There are those who claim that merely being a good person is a free pass through the door or gate to heaven. They likewise say you don’t have to be religious; you can simply be spiritual. They insist you don’t have to follow Jesus’s exact words; you just have to follow the spirit of love-your-neighbor. They also believe that God is all-loving which translates in their minds to mean He would never disapprove of a homosexual man for being in love and having sexual relations with another man or disapprove of a pregnant woman for her choice to do whatever she wants with her own body, such as killing the child in her.
In my brusque version of admonishing sinners, these people are horribly wrong. In my compassionate version of admonishing sinners, these people are ignorant or unaware and need guidance. Of course, any difficult talk involving criticism of another’s actions must be done with compassion. I recall when we were parents of young kids that the best cough medicine my wife and I gave our children was the version that tasted horrible. The cough syrup with the Indian herb tree bark – as awful as it tasted going down – was much more effective at quelling the cough than the syrup with the sweetened orange flavoring. Just as my wife and I compassionately said to our kids, “We know it tastes horrible, but we care for your health and you have to take it to get better,” so too does one who admonishes a sinner say, “I know it is hard to take this news, but I care for your soul, and you need to hear it.” Giving people some tough love statements in hopes of stopping their sinning will not at first be accepted as sweet, but it’s the medicine they need. Love speaks the truth and warns of wrongs, and this can often be distasteful.
Too many people these days don’t want to offend others so they don’t point out others’ errors or poor choices, even though their silence or lack of intercession might be a form of cooperating with sinning against God. For example, if you don’t want to insult a male friend of yours who suffers from gender dysphoria and is wanting to take female hormones and be castrated, you either remain quiet or affirm him by telling him to live “his truth.” But by choosing to not offend this guy, you are offending God, who is “the truth” and created this person to be a man.
Similarly, too many parents these days want to be their children’s best friends, and with this mistaken view, these parents don’t want to come down too hard on disapproving of their kids’ actions. If son and daughter get mad at what mom and dad said to them, these parents wrongly believe that they did something wrong in saying it. The reality is the children’s anger means that the parents struck a nerve and that, deep down, the youngsters know the adults of the family were right. The kids might be mad or sad initially, and in fact these negative feelings toward their parents might last for a long while, but they will come around and as they mature they will eventually tell mom and dad that in retrospect they appreciate that they had parents who spoke the truth and cautioned against immoral or foolish actions.
When we judge someone’s exterior components – their actions – our objective is not to feel superior by telling this person how horrible he or she is. Our objective is to keep the person from creating a permanent separation from God and to get this person on the right, albeit narrower, path as he or she continues life and hopefully starts making wiser choices. Jesus is our example of what admonishing a sinner should look like when we attempt to lovingly confront one in danger of eternal punishment. In the well-known Bible story of people wanting to stone the adulterous woman (John 8), Jesus shooed away the people from trying to stone her (the wrong way to admonish!) but He then told the woman to sin no more. He asked the woman if anyone had condemned her, not if anyone had judged her. There is a distinction between judgment and condemnation, and Jesus clearly differentiates between the two. He does not say that her adultery was right, or justified, or worthy of praise. He did not say, “Whom am I to judge?” It is clear in this story that the path to eternal life with Jesus calls for one to repent and does not include acceptance of sin.
Just remind yourself that you are not judging your friend’s or your child’s interior souls, but you are judging their exterior actions. We judge the sin because we are called to do so. Saint Paul said:
“Preach the word, be urgent in season and out of season, convince, rebuke, and exhort, be unfailing in patience and in teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own likings, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander into myths. As for you, always be steady, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.” (2 Timothy 4:2-5)
And even more persuasively, realize that God holds admonishing the sinner and bringing him or her back to the narrow path in such high regard that He inspired the Apostle James to write this:
“My brothers, if anyone among you should stray from the truth and someone bring him back, he should know that whoever brings back a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.” (James 5: 19-20)
Finally, in the Old Testament we hear God implore us to let our neighbors know when they are acting sinfully, lest their blood will be on our hands when they die and suffer the consequences of hell.
“So you, son of man, I have made a watchman for the house of Israel; whenever you hear a word from my mouth, you shall give them warning from me. If I say to the wicked, O wicked man, you shall surely die, and you do not speak to warn the wicked to turn from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity, but his blood I will require at your hand. But if you warn the wicked to turn from his way, and he does not turn from his way; he shall die in his iniquity, but you will have saved your life.” (Ezekiel 33:7-9)
God wants us to be His watchmen and watch-women – to “warn the wicked to turn from his way.” Perhaps the best statement that tells us that our Lord expects us to not only judge sin but speak up when we see it, no matter how hard it may be to both give and take admonishment, came from Saint John Chrysostom, who simply said, “We must not mind insulting men. If by respecting them, we insult God.”
As Jesus told his disciples, the narrow way is not easy, and those who find it are few. For us, it will be difficult – taking much dedication and a willingness to risk friendships and societal acceptance – by acting counter-culturally and pointing out actions that are immoral or foolish. We may lose friendships by admonishing others for sinful actions, and we may cause our children to scream, “I hate you!” when we judge their actions and reprimand them. The person who loves their sin above everything else, including more than they love their Creator, will no doubt become sensitive to any correction or exposing we do when we judge their sin.
…Judge anyway.
A PRINCIPAL'S PRINCIPLES FOR PARENTING 
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