Teach Children That Their Gestures Are a Big Deal

Too many Catholics have deemphasized the lay faithful’s pious postures and mannerisms during the Mass which past generations understood as significant and purposeful. We need to be resolute and diligent in teaching our younger generation the proper gestures to take at Mass. 

During my years as a Catholic school principal, each spring we had our 14-year-olds rehearse for their upcoming eighth grade graduation ceremony. They needed to practice how in the official ceremony they would walk forward to receive their diplomas directly from our pastor after first shaking hands with him. I had to spend time during this rehearsal to literally teach the kids how to shake someone’s hand. So many modern-times teenagers had never learned the simple gesture of giving a handshake with a firm grip and while looking the person in the eye. 

Both Kids and Adults Need Formation

Just as it is important to instruct our younger generation in how to do fundamental gestures such as firmly shaking hands or politely holding a door open for someone, we must also teach them the proper mannerisms to take when in church. In fact, it is not only essential that young Catholics grow up knowing how to properly, purposely, and piously move and act at Mass, but many adult Catholics need similar instruction. 

Because of the improper unfolding of Vatican II over 50 years ago, too many older Catholics grew up within a lukewarm form of Catholicism that downplayed pious postures. The purposeful gestures to take during the Sacrifice of the Mass were deemphasized starting in the late 1960s. Without being properly formed, Catholics born in the latter part of the 20th century were ill-informed on how to teach today’s youth the when, why, and how to kneel, stand, and bow at Mass.

Physically Expressing Reverence to the Lord

Gestures, postures, and mannerisms play a considerable part of how Catholics celebrate the Sacrifice of the Mass. We begin before Mass even starts by blessing ourselves with holy water by making the Sign of the Cross immediately upon entering the church. We then genuflect on our right knee as we enter the pew. For the next 60 minutes we repeatedly kneel, bow, sit, and stand. We even beat our breasts and stick out our tongues.

We witness the priest, deacon, and altar boys ringing bells and swinging a thurible censer to diffuse incense. They also may shake an aspergillum full of holy water at us, and we automatically respond by blessing ourselves with the Sign of the Cross. We partake in these actions so to show reverence to our Lord and attentiveness to the priest, who is acting in the person of Christ (“in persona Christi”) when he offers the Mass.

When instructing their children why Catholics perform specific actions, parents can begin by noting that gestures at Mass are way that help us express our devotional affection to Christ. We express our love and dedication in bodily form because one’s physical disposition is very significant.

An example is when someone of high distinction enters a room, such as a king or a judge. The people rise as a sign of respect. Similarly, when the priest begins the processional to begin Mass, we instantly stand and initially keep our eyes on the crucifix carried forward by the altar boy. 

Another way to explain the significance of specific postures can be to discuss various moments in the Bible, such as when Jesus prayed:

“When Jesus had spoken these words, He lifted up His eyes to Heaven and said, ‘Father, the hour has come; glorify thy Son that the Son may glorify thee.’” (John 17:1)

Jesus knew that Heaven is not physically in the sky and that His Father and ours is not located up high somewhere sitting on a cloud. Yet Jesus bends back His head and raises His eyes upward when He prays to God as a gesture of respect and love. He is acknowledging the dignity of the Father and teaching us how our bodily disposition demonstrates how to profoundly, humbly communicate in prayer. 

Kids of All Ages Need Instruction

Besides explaining the numerous gestures and postures performed by the congregation at Mass, mom and dad should expect their kids to join them in performing these actions in church. This expectation can begin with children as young as four. When I administered in a Catholic school and our entire student body attended Mass together, our one preschool teacher could get her herd of kiddos to all sit, stand, and kneel together at the proper times. So it is not too much to expect two parents to get the same proper behaviors out of their one preschool-age child. 

The expected postures, gestures, and mannerisms that parents should teach and require from their children, after the aforementioned Sign of the Cross with holy water and genuflecting before entering the pew, include the following. (Note that these actions are referring to the typical Novus Ordo Mass, and not a Traditional Latin Mass. Also, some of the following actions may be too advanced for the youngest-age children.)

1. We kneel down after entering the pew to spend a minute in silent prayer in preparation for Mass.

2. We strike our breasts if praying the Confiteor during the Penitential Act so to strengthen our awareness that our sins are our fault.

3. We stand as a sign of reverence when the Gospel is read. We then make a fist with our right hand and with our right thumb we make a small Sign of the Cross over our forehead, lips, and chest. We do this because we want God’s Word to be on our minds, on our lips, and in our hearts. Some silently pray something similar to these words when making this small Sign of the Cross, “May the word of God be ever in my mind, proclaimed by my lips, and pierce my heart leading me to deeper communion with you, Jesus.”

4. We bow when we reach the specific section of the Creed which commemorates the Incarnation, signifying our profound respect and gratitude to Christ who, though God, did not hesitate to come among us as a human being.

5. We listen for the altar boy to ring bells when the priest performs the Consecration. The bell-ringing alerts us to look toward the altar and pay attention to this important act commencing. Jesus is about to be made present on the altar!

6. We keep our eyes fixed on Christ, present under the appearance of bread and wine, during the two times when the priest elevates the host and chalice. Simultaneously, each time we silently profess an act of love and adoration, with the most common expression being to silently mouth the words of St. Thomas the Apostle, who when he encountered the risen Christ exclaimed, “My Lord and my God!”(Read John 20:19-29.)

7. We also kneel and gaze in awe and adoration at Christ present in the bread one more time just before Communion. This is when the priest raises for all to see the large host he is about to consume and loudly proclaims, “Behold the Lamb of God!” 

Communion Time Gestures and Postures

Perhaps the most neglected teaching in the proper gestures and postures at Mass is how to properly move and act during Communion. Regrettably, many parents are just as ignorant in this area as their children. For the past five or so decades, the Church has not emphasized the following pious actions to take before, during, and after receiving the Body and Blood of Christ.

• Walk slowly with your hands folded in prayer as you make your way forward to Communion. Focus your eyes on the crucifix near or behind the altar and not down the pews to see if you can spot any friends.

• If you will be receiving the Sacred Host while standing, bow before it as the person immediately in front of you is receiving. You bow to show reverence, just as a knight would bow before a king. 

• Most Catholics nowadays receive in the modern action of having the host placed in the hand, with one hand open and the other hand below it, making a “throne” for placement of the host. Contrary to what recent generations were taught at their First Communion, you are not to pick up the host with your fingers. This creates a chance of dropping particles of Jesus. Instead, the proper posture is to bend your head down to literally eat the Body of Christ directly from your palm and even licking your palm of particles if need be.

• However, since the best way to reverence a king – especially Jesus, the King of the World – is to kneel, the preferred way to receive the host is to kneel. And receiving on your tongue is the best way to make sure Christ’s entire Body remains intact. So if you will be kneeling, you do not need to bow immediately prior. You simply open your mouth and extend your tongue in a respectful way. Nothing creates more reverence than kneeling before Jesus in the Eucharist, where He is truly present and living. Nothing is as intimate and humbly as letting Christ – in the form of the priest – feed us with His own hands as a mother feeds a child. After all, the Church is our mother. 

• Regardless of receiving in the hand or on the tongue, the priest or minister will hold up the host and say, “Body of Christ.” You are to eye Jesus present in the bread and respond, “Amen!”, which means “I believe!”  It is optional to make the Sign of the Cross immediately after receiving the Body of Christ.

• If you do not wish to drink the Blood of Christ, you should make a small, reverent bow when passing the person who is holding the chalice. If receiving the Precious Blood, use both hands to take the chalice offered you. As the priest/deacon/minister says, “Blood of Christ,” you respond, “Amen!” (“I believe!”) and take a tiny sip.

• Just as you did when walking forward to receive Communion, when walking back to your pew after receiving you should do so in a slow and respectful manner with your hands folded in prayer and not looking around the church. You now have Christ in your body and soul! You should be in awe, totally focused on this miracle!

• Once back at your pew, you are to immediately kneel to pray, thanking Jesus for coming to you. Spend this time asking Him to help you to be more like Him in how you behave and treat others. A wise gesture is to close your eyes during this time to prevent being distracted by all those walking past your pew and to be able to pray more fervently.

It is easy to act impiously and indifferently during Communion time, especially if nonchalantly approaching and handling the Sacred Host. Not only is this time not equivalent to walking in a stadium’s concession stand line, but the bread is Jesus and not a treat we are being handed like a jellybean to casually pop in our mouths.

Moms and dads will find that if they not only teach their children the above reverent gestures during Communion time, but practice these themselves, the Eucharist will become a more fulfilling experience. 

What Not to Do

Just as there are proper gestures and postures during the Mass to teach children, there are also improper actions that need to be extinguished. Two of the most common infractions are holding hands with those around us during the praying of the Our Father, and holding one’s hands extended with palms facing upwards during certain parts of the Mass.

The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is not a gathering focused on mutual affection. Thus, during the Mass, our eyes and hearts are lifted to Heaven — not to each other. Gestures like hand-holding pervert the proper spirit of adoration and interior recollection that the liturgy demands.

Holding hands during the Our Father came about during the hippie-like “togetherness” movement promoted after Vatican II. There had never been any Catholic liturgical history prior where the faithful held hands during a Mass. Since the Our Father is a prayer addressed to the Father by His Son, on behalf of us, during the context of a sacrifice which is about to take place, this is not a time for communal, shared affection. During the Our Father, the proper gesture should be for each individual to clasp one’s hands together in a prayer formation.

As for holding up and extending one’s hands in a manner that copies the priest’s gestures, this is commonly called the “Orans” posture/position/gesture. (“Orans” means “praying.”) The General Instruction of the Roman Missal mentions over two-dozen times during the Mass when the priest is supposed to take up this posture.  The laity in the pews are never directed to pray similarly with hands extended. Again, the best and most frequent hand position for Catholics during Mass is to clasp one’s hands together in a prayerful gesture.

The Mass’s Sensory Engagement Strengthens Our Faith

All of the gestures and postures we perform in church intensify our prayer at Mass.  These bodily movements have another function in that they are symbolic of the unity of believers who have come together to worship.

Together in church – whether we are 4-years-old or 44-years-old – we stand, kneel, sit, bow, and sign ourselves in common with all those around us. By doing so, we are witnessing that we are truly the Body of Christ.